Unsinking Focus

Christians, what is our purpose here on earth? To glorify God. To hope in Him. To share Him. To worship Him. No matter our circumstances.

Yesterday, I had a couple of hours when I forgot this truth. My first day back in the swing of things from a glorious vacation, I was facing some uncomfortable moments of anxiety. One was relational, the other was in the headline news. Yuck. My stomach started to hurt, I felt drained and tired. My thoughts went awry with introspection and analysis. Then anger...

I didn’t even pray for several hours. Instead, I allowed my mind and heart to stay right there. And I was miserable.

As I drove to pick my kids up from school, the Lord, in His gracious mercy, brought a well-known story from Matthew 14 to my mind:

Jesus was walking on water, and it FREAKED the disciples out. I have to say, I’m with the disciples here...that would be over the top crazy. They wanted proof that it was the Jesus they knew.

“Lord, if it’s You,’ Peter replied, ‘tell me to come to you on the water.’

‘Come,’ He (Jesus) said.

Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid...”

Yup. Good ole Peter. Had Jesus right there in front of Him, and He noticed the WIND? Crooked finger circles around and stops right on myself. I was Peter yesterday. I had spent time in His presence earlier that morning, and I saw Him in all His glory. But the wind of worry came and took my eyes off of Him only hours later. And I kept my focus there until my attitude began to sink...

“But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, ‘Lord, save me!’

Immediately Jesus reached out His hand and caught him. ‘You of little faith,’ He said, ‘Why did you doubt?’”

I can picture Peter, his eyes having zoomed back in on the Savior, stuttering...”I-I-I-I don’t know actually. I have no idea why I doubted You, of all people. What was I thinking? Thank You for saving me from sinking.”

Can any of you relate to this? Maybe it’s a problem child or a rocky marriage or the news of public healthcare...uncertainty for the future, a loss of income, conflict with a family member or friend. Maybe your circumstances are so overwhelming that you feel you are sinking under them. Perhaps it’s a bunch of tiny annoyances combined with hormones and stress, stacking up to steal your joy. And even though you have experienced His provision, His peace and His presence in the past over and over and over again, here comes that new wind from a different direction, and you start to sink.

Take a moment to think about the wind of worries in your life. Many of us don’t like to call worry what it actually is...an online dictionary defines it as “to be worried, concerned, anxious, troubled, or uneasy.” In other words, all the feelings we experience when we take our eyes off of Jesus. Truth is, we are all subject to it.

He understands that we will and even why we lose our focus, but He challenges us to do the opposite.

“Why do you doubt? It is I!”

So my friends, my prayer for all of us today is that no matter what or who has blocked our view of the One who does miracles, who provides for every single need, who holds all things together...no matter the care or worry...that we will take the Messiah’s hand and turn our eyes upon Him. “Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for HE who promised is faithful.” Hebrews 10:23.

He is sovereign. He is faithful, and I will never EVER sink when my heart’s focus is fixed on Him.

Sing with me:

“Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace. O soul, are you weary and troubled? No light in the darkness you see? There’s light for a look at the Savior, And life more abundant and free! So turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace.”

~Helen H. Lemmel, 1922

I'm Safe

"Whatever the particular call is, the particular sacrifice God asks you

to make, the particular cross He wishes you to embrace, whatever the

particular path He wants you to tread, will you rise up, and say in your

heart, 'Yes, Lord, I accept it; I submit, I yield, I pledge myself to

walk in that path, and to follow that Voice, and to trust Thee with the

consequences'? Oh! but you say, 'I don't know what He will want next.'

No, we none of us know that, but we know we shall be safe in His hands."

~Catherine Booth

A quote received in my inbox this morning. A sorely needed word.

I'm reminded of all "the particular calls" God has given me in my life, and almost every one of them has left me scratching my head at the time. I seem to pull a Gideon more often than not: "What? Me? I think you have the wrong person, God. She's more talented. Such-n-So is more qualified. I'm a mess, a big bag of emotional crazy. You know me...c'mon, now!"

The Holy Spirit then speaks into my heart, mind and soul, reminding me who I am in Christ, and that none of it's about me anyway. I've become quicker to answer His calls as I've grown in my faith walk, but it is still a challenge, depending on how out of my comfort zone the request seems to be.

Then there's the whole "cross to embrace" and "path to tread" thing. Most Christ-followers would agree this is a bit more difficult to live out authentically, because it involves pain & sacrifice & surrender & longing for relief.

The path can be so lonely. During the rocky part of the trail, we listen to others around us talking about being on top of the mountain and rejoicing, about serving the Lord--how He'll make our paths straight--and even though we've spoken those same words before, in those moments, it seems as though they're speaking a foreign language or even "Wah-wahing" like the grown-ups in Charlie Brown.

That doesn't mean their words aren't true...it simply means that we aren't experiencing them at that moment. Sometimes it seems like it's been a whole other life since we've done so. In our deepest heart of hearts, we long to "count it all joy" and "rejoice in suffering," but we acknowledge that we're not there yet and God still has more work to do in and through us.

I mean no disrespect, but does anyone know what I'm talking about here?

So what's the answer?

In times of doubt, discouragement, depression, wondering, wandering, wrestling, restlessness, suffering, persecution and temptation--big, medium or small--I believe the answer is the same:

Dependence.

The Bible says we can fully trust Him; thus, we can fully depend on Him. When we choose to depend on God's sovereignty, we are willingly surrendering our own spirit to be consumed with His.

That's what Jesus did in the midst of His worst moments. "Into Your hands, I commit my Spirit," he groaned. My elaboration..."Into YOUR hands...even if that means more pain. Even if it means humiliation. Even death, Father, I'm committed to Your way."

Jesus was safe in His hands, and so are we. Say this out loud with me:

"I'm safe in His hands."

Then, fully surrendered, completely dependent, let's say this to God:

'Yes, Lord, I accept it; I submit, I yield, I pledge myself to

walk in that path, and to follow that Voice, and to trust Thee with the

consequences."

Yes, Lord, I'm depending on You.

"He alone is my rock and my salvation;

He is my fortress, I will not be shaken.

My salvation and my honor depend on God;

He is my mighty rock, my refuge.

Trust in Him at all times, O people;

pour out your hearts to Him,

for God is our refuge.

~Selah"

Psalm 63:6-8, NIV

***By the way, I receive quotes like this one, something to challenge me every day from "I Lift My Eyes Web Ministries." If you'd like to sign up to have a daily quote too, click HERE.

Big Fat Honkin' Truck on a One Lane Road

Right in the middle of busy Suburbia is a one-lane road (each way) that helps people get from East to West more quickly than the typical stoplight-filled streets. It will usually cut my driving time by almost half, so it has become my choice route when I need to go that way. There’s a drawback, though. Many new homes and businesses are being built along this soon-not-to-be-country road, so that means lots of big, SLLOOOOOOW construction trucks. If I get stuck behind one of these, not only have I lost my “saved” time, but I actually go into debt! Not to mention, my patience flies right out the window with the time, which is where the title of this devotional came from, adjectives barely eeking through the gritted teeth of my firm-frowned mouth.

Phew! Deep breath.

It’s also true that we as Christians are on a narrow road in this life, and It is quite the adventure a good majority of the time--bends, bumps and all. Every now and then, though, a spiritual “big, fat honkin’ truck” gets in front of us, slowing us WAY down and obstructing the view along the way (not to mention our patience sometimes ☺).

Let’s take a moment lately to think about the things that slow us down on our faith journey? What sins have us on a detour? Has suffering pulled us off to the side? Do questions or doubts have us veering to the right and then the left, trying to find the right way? Has wordly pleasure taken us “downtown”?

If the answer is “yes” to any of these questions, then let’s allow the Word of God to be a lamp unto our feet and a light unto our path through the power of the Holy Spirit:

“Whether you turn to the right or the left,

your ears will hear a voice behind you saying,

'This is the way; walk in it.’”

Isaiah 30:21

He will show us the way as we are listening to Him...

“Thomas said to Him, ‘Lord, we don’t know where You are going,

so how can we know the way?’

Jesus answered, ‘I am the way and the truth and the life.

No one comes to the Father except through me.’”

John 14:5-6

He will be our way as we trust in Him...

“For He will command His angels concerning you

to guard you in all your ways;”

Psalm 91:11

He will protect us along the way as we follow Him...

“Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles,

and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.

Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith,

who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame,

and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men,

so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.”

Hebrews 12:1-3

He will help us run with perseverance as we fix our eyes on Him...

“This is what the Lord says:

‘Stand at the crossroads and look;

ask for the ancient paths,

Ask where the good way is, and walk in it,

and you will find rest for your souls.’”

Jeremiah 6:16a

He will give us rest along the way as we ask direction from Him...

“Teach me Your way, O LORD, and I will walk in Your truth;

Give me an undivided heart, that I may fear Your name.

Psalm 86:11

He will teach us along the way as we are fully devoted to Him...

No matter what gets in front of us, friends, with patience, we can endure and enjoy this life! SO~~

May God give you more and more grace and peace as you grow in your knowledge of God and Jesus our Lord. By His divine power, God has given us everything we need for living a Godly life. We have received all of this by coming to know Him, the One who called us to Himself by means of His marvelous glory and excellence. And because of His glory and excellence, He has given us great and precious promises. These are the promises that enable you to share His divine nature and escape the world’s corruption caused by human desires.

2nd Peter 1:2-4

Amen.

Please come back to visit on Friday, September 11th.

I'll have a very special tribute posted that day...

Me, Myself & Doubt

“When they saw Him, they worshiped Him; but some doubted.” Matthew 28:17 (NIV)

Is it possible to believe and doubt at the same time? NO. I mean, YES!!! Absolutely not! It is, too!

If two people were having this conversation, it would be tense enough, but if this were a conversation between me, myself and I--well, that’s just scary. Yet, how often do I find myself in this exact predicament? I put my eyes on Him, He shows Himself to me, and at the same time I'm wondering if that was actually Him or not.

The above verse from Matthew occurs after Jesus’ ministry on earth, after He has died, after He has been risen from the dead, and after others said He'd appeared to them and was still alive.

The “they” in the verse refers to the eleven that had been with Him the whole time. Now, if it’s possible for almost a dozen men to see everything in person that Jesus had done and still have some doubts afterwards, then how much more true is that for you and me as His disciples today?

This is no surprise to God. He knows us intimately enough to understand that we are going to doubt Him from time to time. How faithful He was, though, to give us His Word as a reminder that He is God, He is faithful and He listens to our prayers. This is where our faith in Him kicks in---it is even modeled for us in Scripture.

In Mark 9:14 (NIV) and following, a father comes to Jesus and wants Him to heal his son who has an evil spirit. The dad says, “…IF you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.”

Jesus corrects him, “If I can? Everything is possible for him who believes.”

The father’s response back is what I can relate to… “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” The passage says that the dad exclaimed this! Exclamation point!!!!

Notice in this last emphatic statement that, even though it is an oxymoron technically, it is also NOT an oxymoron. “I do believe,” the dad exclaims.

This shows his limited belief, the kind we can do on our own. Then he says, “help me overcome my unbelief.” This puts the emphasis back on God to do the work in us.

We can muster up all the belief in our hearts, souls and minds, but without God’s help to do so, it will never be enough. This desperate dad gets it! God wants us to get it too. I suspect that’s why He put it in Scripture.

At the end of Luke 24, it goes into the same story that Matthew was telling about the disciples, only it adds more of the details. As they were walking along discussing their doubts about whether Jesus had been resurrected or not, Jesus appears to them and asks them why they are doubting.

See, even though He knew their doubts, He didn’t want them to stay there.

So He patiently pursued this process with them, even showing His scarred hands and feet in order to “prove” that He was alive. The next verse is the key: After all of this conversation, in verse 45 it says, “Then He opened their minds so they could understand the Scriptures.” Jesus gave them instructions and His blessing after that, then was taken up to Heaven.

This was their life changing moment. After He opened their minds, they understood. Once again, it was His power, not their ability to believe on their own. It says at the end of the verse that “then they worshipped Him and returned to Jerusalem with great joy. And they stayed continually at the temple, praising God.”

How cool is that! Before Jesus opened their minds, they half-worshiped, half-doubted. After He opened their minds, they had great joy and continually praised Him. We can enjoy the latter, if...

...If we'll stop trying to believe on our own with what little we have and begin to depend on what plenty He has.

...if we'll open our minds so that we can experience Him to the full.

...if we'll study His character and remember His faithfulness.

...if we'll learn to hear His voice and tune out the doubting.

He will help us overcome our unbelief. And there's no doubt about that. Exclamation Point! Do you believe it?

Internet Cafe Devotions: Waves Overwhelming

I'm at the Internet Cafe today with an honest look at the waves of trials that have surged in and out of my life. Here's a preview:

I knew that if I just cried out to the Lord, His strong arm would hold me afloat and eventually land me on solid ground, but it took way too long for me to actually give it all over to Him. I felt like the man in Mark 9:24 who exclaimed, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!"

To read more, go over to the CAFE and share how God uses this Word in your life. Also share how God has brought you through your own "stuff." I look forward to hearing your feedback.

Growing Up is Hard To Do

~Pause~

“I tell you the truth, when you were younger, 

you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; 

but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, 

and someone else will dress you and lead you 

where you do not want to go. 

Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death 

by which Peter would glorify God. 

Then He said to him, ‘Follow Me!”

John 21:18-19

~~~~

It seems as though Jesus would have said everything He had to say to His disciples before He died. But He was gracious enough to show Himself to them after His “mysterious disappearance” from the grave. He didn’t just appear to them, he ate with them and told them what to do next…several times. 

Of all the disciples, Peter probably needed to see Jesus the most…not because he loved Jesus more than the others, but because He was in need of reassurance after he had told Jesus he would be faithful, only to deny him three times. Jesus has the familiar conversation with Peter: The “Do you love me?” question series….all three times Jesus asks him the question, Peter pledges his love to Him—“Lord, you know that I love You.”

The next verses, the ones listed above, are those that really strike me in this conversation. Isn’t this the case with us, though? “…when you were younger, you dressed yourself and went where you wanted…” When we were young Christians, and some of us still are, we pretty much did what was expected of any new believer…we began to live a “Christian life.”

“…but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands…” The more we mature in our faith, however, the more out of OUR control our lives become. We begin to learn the process of suffering, of depending on Him for our next move, and of giving up the more meaningless methods of coping with life.

Just as Jesus stretched out His hands, let others clothe Him, and allowed Himself to be led to the cross, we too will learn to give ourselves up and be led for Kingdom purposes as we become “older” in our faiths. What is really surreal is that each one of us will learn to die to ourselves in different ways. God is creative as He works on us…His masterpiece, His creation. AND…it may take more time on some of us than others to lead us to that place of spiritual old age with Him.

As Peter and Jesus were having this conversation, the verse goes on to tell us what John was doing: “Peter turned and saw that the disciple whom Jesus loved was following them…when Peter saw him, he asked, ‘Lord, what about him?’ Jesus answered, ‘If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? YOU must follow me.’” In other words, we can’t compare our walk with Him to anyone else’s. He is very clear—YOU must follow Him.

Isn’t it cool that John didn’t even have to be asked… He just followed. John followed Him during His ministry, he followed Him at His death, and He followed Him the rest of His life. Let’s ask God to help us do the same….hopefully, without being asked to do so over and over.

☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼

Will you consider pondering the verses above, as well as the following passage in Mark? Then as He leads, pray...ask Him to teach you from His heart today...

Mark 8:34 -35 says: 

"Then He called the crowd to Him along with His disciples

 and said: ‘If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself

 and take up his cross and follow me. 

For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, 

but whoever loses his life for me 

and for the gospel will save it.’”

What does “losing your life for the gospel” mean to you? 

What cross has He given you to carry as you follow Him?

Leah Orcutt/Guest Blogger

I'd like to welcome Leah Orcutt to Selah today. This testimony she shared blessed me so much, and she gave me permission to publish it here. I pray it causes someone to pause, ponder & praise today...

Walk By Faith

by Leah Orcutt

One night.

That is all it took for life to shake me to the core. Now I sit, questions swirling around like a tornado in my brain. Questions of faith, of future, of reality and falsehood. What am I doing? Where am I going?

Does He really favor me?

There. That's the dead-center of the issue. Can I look at my life, and this situation, and truthfully say, "God is good"?

How can this be good? Either I am a total failure, or the entire situation is grossly unfair, or to some degree, both. What the heck is God teaching me in this moment? How can He ever make good from this?

Let me back up and bring you up-to-date.

Week two of working on my own in my first RN job. I have four patients with various complicated illnesses, and a fresh admit (the fifth). She has an array of illnesses that take almost an hour to make sense of, and now the doctor has written a page or two of orders that need to be done like now. In the midst of taking care of all this, I need to check my other patients, do their assessments, and administer all the medications in a timely manner. Oh, and a couple hours later, they add a second admit to the mix, with his batch of new orders. Remember, this is my sixth day of working on my own just out of training. Nearly about to break down and cry, I go to my charge nurse and tell her I am having trouble getting this all done. "Buck up and deal with it. I can't help you," is her response. I do what any normal person would do--call her roommate at 4am and say, "Pray for me!"

At the end of the night, my manager comes to me and puts me on suspension until further notice. A week and a half later, she calls me to tell me that they will be laying me off in the morning. A phone call to the union reverses that process, but now I am on a sort of probation to prove that I can do my job. Under intense scrutiny and having my charge nurses completely betray me and stab me in the back (telling my manager that I pretty much suck as a nurse after telling me that I did a wonderful job), I find myself questioning what I am doing in this place.

Driving around town tonight on various errands, I wonder if I had heard God correctly. Did He really call me to be a nurse? All the trouble I had in nursing school, struggling to pass my most difficult class; having teachers tell me that I should reconsider my career path; curses from my charge nurses that had turned on me--can all these signs point to the fact that I should not continue? Even in this probation period I struggle to finish all the required tasks in a timely manner. What will I do instead of nursing?

More importantly, the questions that run deeper concern my identity. All my life I have fought the lie that I have no worth, that I fail the most important tasks, that God does not truly love me because I can never measure up. Facing the reality of my glaring failure as a nurse, these questions shake me to the core of my faith in Him to make all things work together for good. Certainly He must not favor me, for this is not good.

I rarely listen to the radio, because I hate the commercials. Tonight, however, I do not feel like listening to a CD, so I tune the radio to Spirit 105.3. Jeremy Camp's "Walk By Faith" comes on a few minutes later, and I begin to sing along out of habit. About halfway through I truly listen to the words:

Would I believe you when you would say
Your hand will guide my every way
Will I receive the words You say
Every moment of every day

Well I will walk by faith
Even when I cannot see
Well because this broken road
Prepares Your will for me

Help me to win my endless fears
You've been so faithful for all my years
With one breath You make me new
Your grace covers all I do

Well I'm broken--but I still see Your face
Well You've spoken--pouring Your words of grace

My windshield blurs, but not simply from the pouring Seattle rain. With tears streaming down my cheeks, I sing along: "But I will walk by faith, even when I cannot see."

I cannot see what the future holds. Whatever I face, He promises to walk through it with me. He must have a purpose for this crisis in my life, and someday I will see the results of this breaking.

Tonight I will face my fears, confront the enemy, rebuke the lie that says I cannot do this job. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13). I will trust the Lord, and walk by faith.

One night at a time.

-----------------

[Author's Note: I passed the probation period, succeeded in doing fairly well as a new nurse, and as soon as God released me, I moved on to the job I love--delivering babies! I would never, ever want to live that time of my life over again, but I can truthfully say that God has used it to refine my character and deepen my faith. That song came in one of the most critical moments to encourage me while in the depths of despair--our God truly is a God of hope!]

Leah loves Jesus Christ with all of her heart! In addition, she reads, writes, hangs out with friends, plays the violin, prays, sings, and delivers babies by night as a nurse in her local hospital. God has radically transformed her life, and she loves encouraging and praying for others to experience His great love. You can find more of her writings at Take Root and Write and Faithwriters.com.

Through...

Oh, how Amy Carmichael has ministered to my soul this morning, and I pray she does for you as well. The trials come, my friends, and when they do, we must put our wading boots on and grab the Lord's hand. Here's how Amy puts it:

"I want to give you a word that helped me all yesterday and will help me today. It is the "through" of Psalm 84:6 and of Isaiah 43:2, taken with Song of Songs 8:5.*

We are never staying in the valley or the rough waters; we are only passing through them, just as the bride in the Song of Songs is seen coming up from the wilderness leaning upon her Beloved.

So whatever the valley is, or however rough the waters are, we won't fear. Leaning upon our Beloved, we shall come up from the wilderness and, as Psalm 84:6 says, even use the valley as a well, make it a well. We shall find the living waters there and drink of them."

*
Psalm 84:6 (ASV): "Passing through the valley of Weeping, they make it a place of springs."
Isaiah 43:2 (KJV): "When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee, and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee."
Song of Songs 8:5 (KJV): "Who is this that cometh up from the wilderness, leaning upon her beloved?"

~Excerpt taken from Candles In The Dark by Amy Carmichael

Friends, when we wade through the valley of weeping, may we drink from the Living Water. And when we come out dripping, may we also be leaning securely upon our Beloved Father. This is what I want. It is my heart's desire. Amen.


In the Key of HE,

Faith-Colored Glasses

Betsy at Just Another Clay Pot is hosting Fiction Fridays today, so hop on over there for more great fiction.

This is my fiction piece based loosely on some of my own circumstances growing up. Fiction with some truth sprinkled in...


Faith-Colored Glasses

“Hey, FOUR EYES, your mom walks funny!”

I was the only one who wore glasses in the third grade. “My name’s BECKY! And your mom would walk funny, too, if her car had been run over by a semi-truck.”

Their relentless teasing continued. “Oh yeah? Well, maybe if she’d had BIG, THICK glasses like yours, she wouldn’t have crashed!” They stuck their noses in the air, snickering their way into the school.

I hate my life.

******

Dad was in his typical after-work reclined position.

“Becky, just shut up for two seconds, you little brat. I’m tryin’ to watch TV.”

Yuck—his breath stinks.

“Hey Lynn, bring me another beer.”

Get it yourself, you lazy bum. Mom has a headache.

He glared at me. “What are you lookin’ at, Stupid? GET-OUTTA-HERE!”

I hate my life.

******

My choir director had bought me a brand new dress for the occasion--the most exciting dance in the 8th grade--assuring me that I should go.

“Hey, Becky, where’s your dad? This is a DADDY/Daughter dance.”

“He doesn’t live with us anymore.”

“Thaaat’s right. He lives at that—(finger snap)—that—(finger snap)—oh yeah, that tavern on the west side of town…orrrr is it the one on the east side?”

My face caught on fire, and I bolted out of there in tears.

I hate my life.

******


“Mrs. Connor? Hi, it’s Becky. Um, I’m going to have to miss the senior concert tonight. Mom’s in the hospital again. I’m so sorry, they’re not sure what’s wrong with her…”

They’re never sure what’s wrong with her.

“…Yeah, well, I have to get to the hospital. She’s asking for me.”

Like I can do anything.

I was ashamed of my tears. “So much for my solo.”

I hate my life.

******

“Wow, Becky—I can’t believe the way you just put a smile on that little girl’s face. No one else has been able to do that. How do you get inside these troubled kids’ heads?”

It felt so good to have someone compliment me for once. “Well, I guess you could say I understand them.”

Maybe there’s a purpose for my life.

******

I can’t believe I’m here singing in front of the whole college.

“When we walk with the Lord,
In the light of His Word,
What a glory He sheds on our way.”

Thank You for shedding Your light on my way, Lord.

“When we do His good will,
He abides with us still,
Even more when we trust and obey.” *

Lord, I accepted You as my Savior when I was six. "Now I want to obey You through ALL my circumstances."

I trust You with my life, God.

******

“Whatcha’ thinkin’ about? Earth to Mom,” asked my daughter.

I scooped her in my arms, then pushed her glasses back onto her nose. “Hi, ‘Lil Dumplin,’ I was just taking a trip down memory lane.”

“Thinkin’ about Gramma again?”

“Yeah, her, among other things.”

“Like?”

“Like the day I began to trust Jesus with my life. I hated my life before then.”

“Daddy says you had an icky childhood.”

“Yeah, it was pretty icky, Punkin’, but you know what? After I said, ‘Okay, Lord, here’s my ick in all its ickiness. Will you please make something of it?’—after I did that, He gave me a special gift.”

Her eyes twinkled with excitement. “What was it, Mommy?”

“A thick pair of faith-colored glasses. And I wore them from that day forward.”

“Faith-colored glasses? Cooooool! What did Gramma look like after you put ‘em on?”

“Different. She still walked crooked…She still had a rough time of it with her brain damage from the car wreck, but…all of a sudden, I noticed new things about her.”

“Liiike?”

“Like how she loved her Bible. How she desperately depended on God for strength. How often she prayed.”

“Wow! That sounds just like you, Mommy.” She pushed up my glasses with her index finger.

I held her close to me. “It does, huh?”

“You know, I think I got a pair of faith-colored glasses, too--at Gramma’s funeral.”

“Yeah?”

She sat up on her knees. “Welllll, I was lookin’ at Gramma’s picture, and I imagined her dancing in Heaven with Jesus. Brand new legs and everything.”

“Yes, honey, those are the same glasses.” She wiped the tear from my cheek.

“I thought so.” She decided it was time to go play.

“Bye, sweetie. Thanks for givin’ Mama sugar.”

“Sure, no problem…FOUR EYES!” Giggles.

“Hey, YOU, look who’s talkin’?”

I love my life.

*****************************************************************************************************

Ephesians 1:18-19a, NIV
“I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He has called you, the riches of His glorious inheritance in the saints,
and His incomparably great power for us who believe…”

* Trust and Obey—Words: John H. Sammis, 1887. Music: Daniel B. Towner


In the Key of HE,

What's In A Wave, Part Two

“…because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea,
blown and tossed by the wind.”
James 1:6b

The first day at the beach on our spring break vacation, it was horribly windy. We were bound to make the most of our tropical experience, however, so we went out to bask in the sand and the sun anyway. I don’t remember ever seeing waves crash like that (in person) before! The sand was stinging my legs and getting in my eyes as it blew at great force. While it wasn’t anything close to the sideway-standing reporters I’ve watched on the news during hurricanes, it still painted a good picture for me of the James verse above.

As I shared in What's In A Wave, Part One, trials come and go in our lives, often knocking us off our feet. Or at the very least, they sometimes send us diving for some source of rescue other than the only One who can help us through it all. We can even begin to make light of our humanness in the midst of the struggle. I know I do at times. It is clear, however, that God intends for me—for us as Christians--to grow in our faith, trusting Him more and doubting Him less each and every day.

I love the way the Message translates James 1:5-8:

"If you don’t know what you’re doing, pray to the Father. He loves to help. You’ll get His help, and won’t be condescended to when you ask for it. Ask boldly, believingly, without a second thought. People who ‘worry their prayers’ are like wind-whipped waves. Don’t think you’re going to get anything from the Master that way, adrift at sea, keeping all your options open."

Ok, so first of all,

He LOVES to help, we’ll GET His help, and we WON’T BE looked down on WHEN WE ASK FOR IT.

Wow. I love it that He is so approachable. I don’t ever have to feel ridiculous or ashamed of needing help with Him. Again, wow. I know this, but I don’t always act like I do.

Secondly, I don’t have to beat around the bush. That phrase about worrying our prayers is really the problem, isn’t it? If we didn’t worry about what He was going to think of us or if He was listening in the first place, then we WOULD come before Him boldly and believingly, wouldn’t we?

Finally, if we think we can out-maneuver God, we’re out of luck. Can any other sources of comfort really fill our hurts, our indecisions or any needs? We can’t have it both ways. We either trust in Him to provide the help, or we keep our options open and continue to ride the waves of ups and the downs that come with the world’s solutions. I certainly don’t want to become a Christian castaway! (I heard an ‘Amen.’)

We must never forget that He-and He alone-has the ability to calm the storm, to stop the wind and the waves as He sees beneficial to us. I forget several times a day, with all kinds of stuff that comes up, and there He is, with His powerful Word and the Holy Spirit to bring me back to His reality instead of my own. That makes me breathe more deeply, more calmly, more confidently.

Today. This day. Right now is the time to believe and not doubt. To trust and obey in His perfect way. Together, let’s do so, I pray.

Lord Jesus, You have searched us and know us. You know that often times we say we believe You, and yet we still need help overcoming our unbelief. Forgive us. Help us and lead us in the way everlasting, Lord, Your way. Help us to trust You today. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

“O LORD God Almighty, who is like You? You are mighty, O LORD, and Your faithfulness surrounds You. You rule over the surging sea; when its waves mount up, You still them.” Psalm 89:8-9

In the Key of HE,

What's In A Wave, Part One

“Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope:
Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,
for His compassions never fail.”
Lamentations 3:21-22

I spent some time on the beach in South Florida this summer. As I stood in the middle of the crashing waves on a windy day, I was all-consumed with a mixture of sensations. Force, power, stinging salt up my nose while pelting my skin and eyes. My two feet were swept off the bottom of the sandy floor in random sequence--first by the wave on top, then by the one in the under-current.

In the beginning of my venture out into the big time, I was strong—it seemed manageable. Ten minutes later, I could hardly breathe, open my eyes, and my whole body was weak, numb and shaking. I wished I had something to float on and pull me into the shore. (I also wished I were in better physical shape—how do those surfers do it?)

Now that I reflect back at this, I can’t help but relate it to the past three years of loss, pain and trials in my own life. When I entered the struggling season, I didn’t even know I was in the middle of an ocean that would push me around me with pounding force for a great while to come. I started out strong and full of hope, with positive prayers and promises to keep me on my feet. 

But another wave of tribulation came, followed by a strong undercurrent of doubt and negativity—then I held my breath as I allowed my own quick-fixes and self-helps to push me further under water. My spirit became weak and numb, and my emotions were shaking and rolling with each wave. 

I knew that if I just cried out to the Lord, His strong arm would hold me afloat and eventually land me on solid ground, but it took way too long for me to actually give it all over to Him.

I whole-heartedly long for steadfast faith no matter which breaker I’m on or beneath. It’s difficult to admit that sometimes I allow my circumstances to interrupt my faith. How many times have I read the passage about Peter walking on water until he took his eyes off of Jesus? I find myself wishing I were in better spiritual shape, but even His disciples struggled.

Thankfully, as I look even deeper into the analogy, I can see God-waves throughout my life as a believer. Waves of hope and protection. Waves of grace and mercy. His love pours over me, flows through me, preserves me. If I am willing to “taste and see that the Lord is good,” His saltiness will rub off on me and then on to others.

Can you relate this experience to your own life? While the troubling surges of life can overwhelm us, only His love will consume us. If we take our eyes off of Him and doubt Him for a time, it’s not long before the Holy Spirit convicts and reminds us where our true hope is found.

So what’s in a wave anyway? The better question is “WHO’s in your wave?” HE IS! When our eyes are on Him, we will have everything we need to surf the waves that would otherwise break us down. From little ripples to huge surges, He longs for us to stay focused on Him, believing and not doubting, trusting that soon we will see it all from Heaven’s shore.

Lord Jesus, help us to be steadfast when the wind and the waves come to knock us off our feet. Help us, show us how to keep our eyes on You no matter what. Our hope is in You, Jesus. We are so small, and YOU are so big. Keep us ever mindful of your largeness in every sense of the word. Thank you for Your all-consuming love, compassion and faithfulness. 

In Jesus’ name, Amen.

In the Key of HE,

Sploshy Steps

Kristen over at Exemplify posted her monthly Monday Manna meme today. I couldn't resist this one, because it is part of the melody of my lifesong.

“The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly,
along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus.”
1 Timothy 1:14, NIV

I love the way the Message puts it too...

"Grace mixed with faith and love poured over me and into me. And all because of Jesus."

The word that stands out to me is 'poured.' Picture being out on a walk, and all of a sudden, it starts to sprinkle. Random wet dots appear on your head and your clothing. But if it begins to pour, you're drenched all the way through your shoes...every sploshy step leaves the marks of your saturated state.

When I picture the grace of the Lord that way, it humbles me. I'm drenched with it. It has completely poured down and covered my stink. And because of who He is, each step I take leaves marks of His grace. Just as if I were to soak someone else with a big hug after coming out of the rainstorm, so I will drench others with Him as I touch their lives with love. With each trial and struggle I walk through stemming from the faith He's given me, so the faith of others can be strengthened.

He desires us to live this saturated life, and we can do so as we fill up on Him.

John 10:10b
"I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."

Lord, I can't thank You enough for pouring out your grace, faith and love. Please keep me soaked in it as I walk through this life. Help me not to trust in anything or anyone other than You to provide rich, abundant life. Be my everything, Lord, and may everyone I touch experience more of You as a result. In Jesus' name, Amen.

In the Key of HE,

Don't Forget To Walk This Wii-kend

We finally broke down and got a Wii for the family. I love the way it involves using your body, and some of us in the family put more of our body into it than others. (Cha cha cha!) ;) How much better that is than sittin' around controlling things with your thumbs. Great fun. (Bump ya hip!)

This morning as I was having my quiet time, I heard the kids upstairs playing with the Wii, grunting and cheering over a tennis match. The Lord brought James, Chapter 2 to my mind:

James 2:14-17 (NLT)
"What good is it, dear brothers and sisters, if you say you have faith but don’t show it by your actions?
Can that kind of faith save anyone?
Suppose you see a brother or sister who has no food or clothing, and you say, 'Good-bye and have a good day; stay warm and eat well'—but then you don’t give that person any food or clothing.
What good does that do?
So you see, faith by itself isn’t enough. Unless it produces good deeds, it is dead and useless."

That says it all. It was just the reminder I needed, mainly because of this: I am more than willing to be active in my faith, but I am not always available. Ouch! It's easy for me to get my head stuck in my laptop or confining myself to the house or the taxi-cab...forgetting that I need to be available to walk next door and say hi to the widow next door or chat with the non-Christian couple on the other side of the street. Or whatever... Your situation may be different. What do you fill your time with that may keep you from showing your faith through deeds to others?

Another aspect of this is being available to SHARE my faith. It's a vewy scawey subject, but it's something I've been convicted about the past month as I've listened to my pastor's messages on evangelism. If I'm too busy, or too apathetic, or too whatever to be willing and ready to share the hope that I have, then something in my spiritual life is totally out of whack! Big crooked finger aimed totally at myself. I've been praying that the Lord would help me re-align my priorities and my attitude as it pertains to this subject.

Philemon 1:6, NIV
"I pray that you may be active in sharing your faith,
so that you will have a full understanding of every good thing we have in Christ."

"ME, ME!!!!" I want to have a full understanding of every good thing I have in Christ. I don't want to miss out on that. Nor do I want to see the tapes played in Heaven (if there is such a thing) of all the opportunities I passed by because of fear or apathy or busyness. Every once in awhile, the thought comes to my mind, "Laura, look around you. That person is going to spend eternity in hell!" Talk about internal admonishment. Right then and there, I pray for open eyes, a sound mind and a willing heart for however God wants to use me.

So that's that. YOu and me. Let's not forget to walk our faith this wii-kend, being prepared and available for whatever the Lord brings our way. I'm praying it, really, and asking Him to help me stop shakin' in my boots as I do.

Ephesians 5:11-16 (The Message)
"Don't waste your time on useless work, mere busywork, the barren pursuits of darkness. Expose these things for the sham they are. It's a scandal when people waste their lives on things they must do in the darkness where no one will see. Rip the cover off those frauds and see how attractive they look in the light of Christ.

Wake up from your sleep,
Climb out of your coffins;
Christ will show you the light!

So watch your step. Use your head. Make the most of every chance you get. These are desperate times!"

In the Key of HE,

Blurry-Eyed Morning

My youngest daughter rushed down the stairs to the beat of her fear. She simply could not sleep with the “thunder booming and lightning bolts.” It was almost time for her to get up and get ready for Vacation Bible School anyway, but I hadn’t finished my prayer time yet. It was interrupted by a barrage of questions from her little mind instead.

“Mom, what if lighting struck our whole house? Where would we live?”

“Well, Sweetie, we would go to a hotel or a friend’s house until it was fixed.”

“What if it caught the house on fire?”

“Then we would be very sad, but we would find another house to live in.”

“What if the lightning hit our computer?”

“Well…we’d replace it.”

“NO! But, Mom, that’s where all our money is!”

I couldn’t help but giggle over that one. “Oh no, darlin’, our money’s in the bank.”

“No, it’s not. It’s in the computer. Daddy showed me. I have seven dollars and seventy-three cents left.”

We went round and round, but she stood fully convinced that her allowance is kept in the computer, because “she saw the money in there.” I lifted her petite frame and hugged her close. Her lack of comprehension endeared me to her.

* * * * *

It’s no coincidence that only moments before, I was having a “Who, What, When, Where, Why” session with my Heavenly Father. How creative of Him to answer my questions through the questions of my eight-year-old.

The answer is that I can’t see life through His grid. It’s a simple Truth, but I need constant reminding with my in-the-moment, literal-thinking brain.

“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the LORD.
“And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.
For just as the Heavens are higher than the earth,
So My ways are higher than your ways
And My thoughts higher than your thoughts.”
Isaiah 55:8-9 (New Living Translation)

When I get to the end of what I can see through the faith He’s given me, I can count on Him to scoop me up tenderly, all the while whispering “I’m in control. Trust me.” And I feel quite certain that my lack of comprehension endears me to Him just like my Ally’s did to me.

I look forward to the day when I fully get it. I like to call it my 1 Corinthians 13:12 day:

Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

Until that day, I’ll choose to trust in what He sees, walking by faith and not by my blurry sight.

Mama On My Mind

It would have been my mama's birthday today. May 7th, same as my hubby's birthday too. I find myself wishing that God had called me out to write Mom's story while she was still alive, because she has quite a phenomenal story indeed. Can't seem to get my mama off my mind.

The bottom line is that she was handicapped by a tragic car accident in her adulthood. The damage from it caused her years and years of horrific pain that I'm sure no more than a handful have experienced in their lifetime. Though it's taken me my whole life to learn, I am forever endebted to the example she set for me in the faith.

When I get disgruntled, her memory is there. When I get discontent, her memory is there. When I get insecure, her memory is always there. As Mother's Day approaches, it will be my second without her to call on the phone. I miss her. So happy she is whole in mind and body, but I miss her none the same.

God-in-her is the reason that I am who I am today. And what I am is someone who desperately depends on the Lord to get me through each day. She taught me the secret that so many Christians cannot even fathom. It is found in 1 Corinthians 1:27-29 (NIV):

"But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him."

The photo above is the last picture my sister and I had with my mom before she couldn't sit up for pictures anymore (only six months later).

Yup, I just got my mama on my mind today...so I may just have to sing a "Happy Birthday" song to her, even if it's just for me.


Two publications have posted my mom's tribute this month, and I am ever so thankful. One is a Christian newspaper in Amarillo, Texas. The other is an online ezine that is viewed all over the world. You can click here if you are interested in reading my mother's incredible story of courage and God-strength: 

http://journezine.com/May08/LessonsShaw/tabid/1648/Default.aspx